The 5-BR/7.75-bath at 5044 Butterworth Road on Mercer Island has been on the market for some time now (491 days and counting). It could be the hefty price tag ($4.67M). It could be the sheer size of the place (9,640 sq. ft.). But to be honest, the broker babble isn't helping much either…
"NEW Designer IMPACT 2014!" What? Are you describing the house or a new anime?
"Beverly Hills home redefining 'OLGLEWORTHY'." Before you redefine it, please define it.
"Celebrating swanky Bling…" To be fair, people still using bling non-ironically are probably the only ones who can afford a house like this anyway.
"Inspired, limited edition inventiveness." Does that actually mean anything or were you just under some kind of words-that-start-with-i quota?
"Graphics for the starstruck." You don't know what starstruck means, do you…
Mother Nature's swathe of palms, blue waters, sunshine, moonlit. This house comes with sunlight AND moonlight? That must've cost a fortune! Does NASA know???
"BELOW...YES, great art gallery, billiards, theatre." What just happened in that sentence? Our brains just melted...
· 5044 Butterworth Rd, Mercer Island [Estately]
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