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Alas, Seattle Will Probably Never Have a Boaty McBoatFace Ferry

Are you looking forward to the time when you can vote to name a Washington State ferry "Boaty McBoatface?" Well, keep dreaming...

We know what you're thinking. You saw the vote for the U.K. research vessel that overwhelmingly picked Boaty McBoatface as it's name of choice (even though it was ultimately denied) and thought to yourself, "Seattle needs a Boaty McBoatface."

As the Seattle Times points out, that's pretty much an impossibility.

Each ferry name proposal requires a sponsor organization to lead the charge, and the suggestion must conform to the Washington State Transportation Commission’s narrow ferry-naming guidelines.

"Names for ferries should carry statewide or regional significance and represent our state’s image and culture," according to the guidelines, which add that names should represent things like state adopted symbols, tribal names, geographic locations, among other suggestions.

If you wanted to name a ferry after an individual, that person has to have been deceased for at least twenty years. And even when public proposals come forward, there's a team that weeds out names that don't conform to guidelines.

That's how we get a fleet of Washington State Ferries that is almost exclusively tribal-named, saved for the Evergreen State ferry.

So here's our plan.

  1. Have a kid and legally change their name to Boaty McBoatface.
  2. Groom that child to become the best Washington State has to offer, potentially as governor if possible.
  3. Have Boaty McBoatface sacrifice his or her life on a Washington State ideal.
  4. Wait 20 years.
  5. Nominate Boaty McBoatface as the name of a new state vessel.

Pretty simple, really.
· Why Washington ferries will never have a Boaty McBoatface [ST]